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How to Erase Your Fears
by On September 23, 2010

There is one thing that more than anything else, holds us back from achieving what we want and desire.

I am talking about fear. Fear, in its various forms, is the biggest killer of our quest for successes, so why is this?

In its simplest terms, fear is an emotion that we experience through a physical response. I’m sure you have felt this physical response before: your palms sweat, your heartbeat increases, your body temperature goes up. This reaction was very-very useful to us, millions of years ago, when the things that cause this reaction in us were out to kill us, such as large animals looking for dinner.

But now, that emotionally based fear response has become extremely unhealthy. I say this because, in the modern world, 90% of the things that we fear are unrealistic to be afraid of. They either will not happen, or even if they did, the outcome would not be that bad.

Think about it, imagine you want to make a big sale, but you are afraid to make the phone call because you are afraid that the person is not going to be interested or they are going to hang up on you. It is not helping you to have this fear since this imagined negative outcome is not likely to happen or, even if it does happen, it is really not that bad. It is unrealistic to be afraid of those things.

But, here is the challenge. We still experience that response anyways. So how do you get rid of it?

Very simply, through the proper use of your but – that is the word B-U-T. “But” is what we call an eraser word. When you hear the word “but” in the middle of a sentence, it erases everything that came before it mentally.

For example, when you say to your kids or a spouse, “You know I love you but….” that person did not hear that you love them, only the phrase that comes after that. When your boss says “Hey, you have been doing a great job but…” you know something bad is coming. When you look at your goal and think to yourself, “I really want to achieve that but, I am afraid.” All that your mind hears is that you are afraid.

You don’t need to change any of the thoughts, just the order that they came in. So, when you experienced a thought like, “I want X but I am afraid.” Simply reverse that to, “I am afraid but I really want X.”

Which side of your “but” are your fears on? If they are before the “but”, you can erase your fears instead of your desires.

Try it out. Do it consistently. I promise you will see great result.

Be Free!

Roger Seip

  1. Bud Katheman

    What a fantastic concept Roger. So simple, powerful, and very clever. I like it! In the future, I will be working towards putting all my fears before my but…

  2. Bobbi Schmitt

    This will also be great when talking to my little one! I want to teach her differently than I (and most of us) was taught. The psychology behind much of what we say is so important and it can be challenging to get that across to a 2-yr old. Thanks Rog!

  3. Katherine Powers

    This is awesome thank-you. I am 47 and I appreciate your way of thinking. I’m afraid at where I am today not knowing where my depression and anxiety will lead me but I really want to make a change. Each day I’m working on setting small goals which will help me to succeed and give me the motivation to set slightly larger goals.I think children should be taught this when they’re young.

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